Dejavu much ?

I hate to say this.




But I think it's Dejavu again.




Why Why...?




I used to love Christmas.




Very very much.




But since last year, I don't put much hope in Christmas anymore.




This year, I met a new person.




I Love Him. And I bet he loves me too.




This person, he can pampered me to the max. Whenever is my fault, he will still apologize to make me feel better.




I can't expect to love anyone else other than him.




But sometimes, he's just like any other guys.




Sometimes, he make me feel so dump, clueless and weak.




I don't want to feel weak ! I don't want anyone to think that I need help all the time.




I can take care of myself. As always.




I don't have much friends, close friends to be with me whenever I need them but I still can manage to live on. As usual.




But the only thing I can't afford to lost is your love, your commitment.




If you think that I'm sensitive, indeed I am.




I like to think alot. From the way you talk to me, you react on my questions, your actions.




I've fall apart again, and again and again.




And I don't ever want to fall in the same trap.




You ask me whether I trust you.. I don't.




Coz you're following 'HIS' footsteps now.




You rather be with someone else on 25th Dec but not me.




And since you've been working, I barely spend time with you.




Message ? During your break or after you finish work.




And in phone calls, you sound tired, and bored. Unlike last time.




I don't really saw the usual smile on your face lately.



But one thing that I'm sure is, I'm a crying baby. I can't help but cry whenever I feel weak.



And I've cried infront of you many many times. I'm sorry. But whenever I'm with you, I feel so weak.



About the crying part, I guess all Libras loves to cry. Well, crying is not a crime. It's just a way to express an emotion, a feeling. I cry whenever I listen to touching lyrics, I cry whenever I watch romance movies, I cry whenever I feel alone, I cry whenever I feel unwanted.




Well things changed, but I don't like the changes at all.




Christmas's coming. Too bad we can't celebrate together.




I hope there's no dejavu hitting on me any sooner. Finger-cross.